the place i go to hide and mutter to myself

So this will be my nine-thousand, four-hundred twenty-sixth leaf turning episode.. I'm back "on the wagon" ... so to speak... I just bought a new laptop and was digging around in the cobwebby insides of my memory when I recalled a glorious heyday of blogging when I spent time on LiveJournal baring my soul.

Okay and maybe it wasn't exactly a "glorious heyday" but it's kind of golden in my memories and now that I'm over 40, I am afforded the luxury of  embellished memory.

That's right, bitches.

Good to be back.

oh yeah. bananaphone.

Greatest. Movie. Ever.

most romantic song ever.. "interesting" video..

Check it!

http://www.suburbanjournals.com/TheaterReviews/Village-Theater-plays-2007-Born-Yesterday.html

Costumes got mentioned TWICE!!  w00t!!!

Mav (Christina Mavroudis-Dempsey) is the costume designer on this show but I HELPED!!  not only that, I was also helping out with the photo shoot.. though the picture they used is terrible.. you can barely see faces..  these people need to learn to cheat to the camera.. 

Oh yeah.. and I really had to keep from laughing at the reviewer.. she has some inaccuracies that are pretty glaring..  oh well!

Anyway..  there is it.. ain't we cute?

I bought a book a couple of weeks ago and I'm so inspired by it.

I love to travel.  Not only do I love to travel, but I love going places I've never been and immersing myself in the culture and the local flavors.  My dream vacation would be about two or three weeks in one place where I could totally take my time and explore it.  When mom and I went to Italy in 2001, that was my hope (in microcosm) when I set up the itinerary.  I wanted to set root in a town for a few days and really see it.

So now this book .. I was passing the travel store on Michigan Ave an I saw it in the window..  it literally stopped me in my tracks.  I started walking again.. then I stopped again, turned around and went in to find it.

it's called "The Lonely Planet Guide to Experimental Travel" -- I don't know if any of you have it but it's probably the coolest thing i've ever found and I am SO going to use it!!

See.. it's filled with all these travel "experiments" -- some intended for actual travel.. some intended for you to do right where you live and some that can be used either way.  What I like about it is the ideas are unique and they inspire you to create your own way of seeing the world you travel through (whether you're travelling through on the way to work or on the way to Rome).  Having browsed through it, I found an experiment I'd like to do and encourage any of you who read this to do as well.

The experiment is called "Synchronised Travel" (note the exotic looking British version of "synchronized") and all you need are a notebook and a camera (digital is probably easier).

Participants travel around their chosen destinations using a 10-stage set of common directions, taking notes and photographs along the way to record their experiences at each stage.  Where the directions don't match the environs, improvise. (quoted more or less directly from the Book listed above).

At each stage, take a photograph (or more if you like, I don't care.  I think it'll be kind of cool to see more than one).

1.  The first stage is your starting point (CLICK!  you could pick somewhere well known or ordinary.. maybe the directions will take you to something the exact opposite?)

2. Walk in any direction for 50 to 100 paces and then turn 180 degrees (click!).

3.  Continue walking in that direction until you see something blue (click!).

4.  Make a left turn and walk 50 to 70 paces (click!).

5.  Walk in any direction until you see something that either is or looks like the number 7 or 11 (click!).

6.  Continue in that direction.  Take your first left and continue walking until you find someplace to sit (click!).

7.  Choose any direction and walk 25 to 50 paces (click!).

8.  Continue walking until you see an unusual shape, texture or (again with the fancy British spelling) colour.  Turn 180 degrees (click!)

9.  Choose a direction and walk until you see an archway or unusual architectural feature (click!).

10. Head for home (or back to your starting point) and continue to look for something that catches your eye (click!).

Doesn't that sound cool??  I love how you can do it and it could be different from the same starting point every time... 

okay.. so then you come and post your pictures/notes.. then either give me a link in comments or let me know they're on your LJ.   I'll post mine when I do it, too.

aannnnnddd... GO!

Every once in a while, I'm lucky enough to get reminded how ridiculous the world can be.

For one thing, I watch WAY too many Lifetime movies.  Yes, I do.  Don't try to talk me out of it because I have proof.

Over the past weekend, I was admitted to Alexian Brothers hospital for a shit load of tests to prove that my mysterious abdominal pains were, indeed, my gall bladder and the marble-sized stones entombed within.  For the record, we're 99.5% certain and I have one more test before I can schedule the outpatient laporoscopic procedure that will free me from the pain and discomfort of my gall bladder.  w00t.

More on that later but for now, the story I'm telling... 

So.. I get home on Sunday afternoon and I'm exhausted.  I went into the bathroom and noticed that my shower curtain is all the way inside my tub.  -- before I go on, you must know that I also discovered this weekend that I have the savant-like ability to describe precisely where every single thing in my house is at any given moment.. I sent Melissa to get an overnight bag together for me and gave her precise instructions on where to find what, what it was next to or behind, what was on the table next to it and which cat would likely be sleeping on top of it .. but I digress, again --  So I notice that this is not normal.. usually my curtain is out of the tub.. the plastic liner stays in, the white fabric stays out.. that's just the way it works.

So I think to myself.. "hmm..that's odd.. but probably nothing.." then I looked up and noticed there was water dripping from one of the spigot handles.  I thought, "hmm.. that's odd.. but it's probably just another leak and whatever.. old building they never fix anything.."  I stop letting anything in the bathroom disturb me and I go to bed.

The next morning, I get up and go to take a shower.  I was getting my hair wet and I turned around..  I swear it was like a shot from a Hitchcock flick.. I heard the crash chord and everything.. there.. on my product sill (the window sill I keep all my crap on) was a black bottle.  On the front it said "Axe" -- I literally froze.  I even looked around and peeked out of the curtain to see if anyone was in the house.  See.. there's NO REASON for there to be a bottle of Axe in my shower.  Mike had been there the weekend before but he uses SOAP!!  Bar Soap.. he's an old fashioned kind of guy!  

Reason prevailed momentarily and I opened it to sniff it (not even CONSIDERING that it could have been a VAPOROUS NARCOTIC.. designed to render me helpless and unconscious for my would-be attacker to have his way with me!!).. just to see if it smelled familiar.. and nope.. it didn't.

So then the wheels start turning.

Who had been using my shower!?  

I started running through all the people who had access to my apartment that it could have been. 

1.  Mike -- naahh.. he used soap.  His son used Axe in the downstairs bathroom but Mike always used soap.

2.  Melissa -- well let's just say if she had been in my apartment while Axe was being showered with, I WOULD HAVE HEARD ABOUT IT ALREADY.

3.  Mysterious Psycho Sicko Maintenance Guy -- here's where I really started panicking.  You need one key to get into the building and another one to get into my apartment.  If this SICKO was deranged enough to use my shower and my towel and my WHO KNOWS WHAT ELSE (was he trying on my underwear, too??) he must be deranged enough to have PURPOSELY LEFT the mostly used bottle of Axe to let his victim know that she was being hunted and it was only a matter of time until he had his prize...

4.  Slightly Weird and Probably Manic Depressive Building Manager -- again.. what kind of sicko would do this and LEAVE EVIDENCE unless he was "letting me know" I was being watched..  EWWWWwwwww...

So.. while I'm trying to figure out what to do.. and come up with contingencies.. I start making calls to eliminate the possibilities..  

Mike didn't answer so I left him a message to call me as soon as he got my message.

I text Melissa..  "umm..  I have to ask you something and I promise I won't be mad if the answer is yes..."  Oh my God what she must have thought..   her answer:  no.

At this point, my ONLY other options -- since I was CERTAIN Mike uses soap -- were Mysterious Psycho Sicko Maintenance Guy or Slightly Weird and Probably Manic Depressive Building Manager.  I was doomed.  

I told my friends at lunch about it and they were all in agreement that it was totally weird.. but then they were also convinced that Melissa was lying to me because she was embarrassed..  I was like..  umm..  No.  Melissa would have that tattooed on her ASS and show everyone who would look long enough for her to turn and drop her pants..  I just told them I'm going to have to set the chain on the door from now on.. and call the police and have my shower and the black bottle dusted for fingerprints.. I'm envisioning crime scene photographers and scrappy, wrinkled suit wearing police detectives who smell like old coffee and stale cigarettes asking me questions about my sex life.. watching for blinking red camera lights in small crevices in my bathroom.. 

After lunch, I notice Mike has called back. 

Now, Rich, one of the guys I have lunch with, sits across the aisle from me.. we pretty much hear each others' phone calls.. give each other shit all day long.. it pretty much rules.  So I tell him, "oh! Mike called.. I'm gonna try to reach him.."  so I call and this is what Rich hears:

"Hi Honey.. I gotta ask you something..You didn't happen to leave a bottle of Axe at my house did....  oh..   it is? ... oh.. no I didn't notice you smelled different... "

And I hear Rich sitting at his desk laughing his ass off.  I threw something at him and told him to STFU.

So.  Yeah.  TOO many Lifetime Movies.

god dammit that's funny.

You know, I left the house early today to get here early so I could leave early.. funny how that works.. anyway.. it was chilly but still mild and I was kind of struck by the fact that the sun is coming up earlier now.. the sky was the prettiest morning color.. there were ribbons of pink in the sky and it was so nice. It reminded me of early mornings in the desert where I grew up.. crisp and clear and bright with morning colors everywhere and the smell of cold air and new dayness. It made me think of walking barefoot on the morning sidewalks when it was still cold to the touch.. that sound of bare foot flopping onto concrete as I hurried wherever I was going.. It was a nice memory.

I think it's interesting.. the things that trigger memories in me lately. Maybe I'm starting to get to a point where I can remember more of what I don't remember as a kid? For instance, last night I had dinner at a great restaurant in Oak Park.. I sat down and ordered a drink -- and I wanted something I'd never had before.. so I ordered a Manhattan on the rocks. I was thinking about how cozy this place was.. It reminded me of something I couldn't put my finger on.. it was comfortable and welcoming and I thought, yeah, this is the place I want to be right this instant. Then my drink came and I took a sip and just smiled and smiled -- instantly transported to my five year old body.. sitting on my Pop-Pop's lap as he was reading the paper with one arm.. a small glass of his "medicine" on the right side chair arm. I would always ask Pop-Pop for a taste of his medicine.. and he would let me have one sip.. but that taste always sets off one of those memories for me.

Of course I found out later that he was probably having a highball.. but now I think it might have been a Manhattan.

My Pop-Pop died when I was 6, so I never really got to know very much about him. My grandmother is ornery and doesn't like to talk about him because it still makes her sad.. (31 years later).. so those few things I have of him manage to come back with a clarity that always surprises me.

I wish I'd known him better.

 

How about a current picture..  this was the end of May.